jordan tolbert
Your big day is tomorrow. Another year, another chance to display your very prominent [or nonexistent] social status in the ruthless jungle of high school. Do you sit at the end of your bed and dream of the possibilities? Or do you send out a mass text telling your friends to “remember” to buy you balloons?
My opinion on birthdays as a teenage girl of sixteen is that the more cookies, balloons, and gifts that you get, the cooler you feel. Yeah, I don’t send out mass texts telling people to get me stuff, but balloons make me feel special and I will never turn down birthday brownies.
According to the entire self-conscious population of girls at our school, popularity can be measured by the number of balloons bobbing around behind you. That’s why, at MC, your birthday is the most important day of the year.
The reasoning behind the need for an excessive amount of attention on your special day stems from the natural desire for acceptance in a place [high school] where acceptance is a rare find. Unfortunately, girls are judged by their evident popularity instead of inner qualities.
First, the balloons. It appears that the number of balloons you get represents each dedicated friend you have. No balloons, no friends. It’s kind of dumb, but let’s be real. If you got zero balloons on your birthday you’d want to cry a little.
Next, the food. When someone walks up to you with a batch of cookies they made you the night before, or little cupcakes iced with a “happy sixteenth!” on top, it’s pretty freaking exciting. Also, the swarm of “friends” surrounding your baked goods makes you feel pretty popular, huh?
Lastly, the Instagram birthday dedications. Every teenage girl wants to see their feed filled with tributes to their special day from all their friends. Don’t lie, you feel good when a buddy tags you in a little “happy birthday” post on Insta.
So the next time your birthday is just around the corner, remember, the more goodies you receive, the more important you are in the “jungle” we call high school.
