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The Sunburn

The Sunburn is the parody/satire section of the MC Sun. Articles posted under the Sunburn may or may not use real names and events. All articles within the Sunburn are either fiction of exaggerations of the truth. Stories regarding politicians, celebrities, or the Mt. Carmel staff, are based on real people, but will be almost completely fictional. The Sunburn section in no way represents truthful news and those who believe the news to be true are mistaken.

Book Worms

The American flag stands at half mast, in commemoration of the brutal deaths of books in the library… by grub. This enigmatic occurrence holds the school in suspense as to how this is happening. “I just wanted to casually look like I’m reading in the library so this girl would …

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GolfKart Gang

After the students leave and the front gates are locked, the lights in the stadium turn on to illuminate the Super MC GolfKart Races. Applicants for Campus Security at MC face a series of crucibles before they are admitted. “We ensure that every member of Campus Security can complete a …

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Social Media Socrates

Cheezus shares his wisdom by granting us with an analogy for life through the godly food of pizza. We are all better prepared for life due to his profound insight on struggle and love. Tears fill my eyes every time I read this beautiful ode to a teenagers true love. …

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Panhandling Pancakes

Most highschoolers only want one thing in life: Cakey, gooey stacks of pancakes with syrup oozing down the sides. But there is a dilemma. Money. The wallet-ravaging epidemic known to most high-schoolers as “being broke,” has finally met its match. IHOP’s unlimited pancakes. There are several methods of achieving this …

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Where the chargers are really going

On Sunday, the NFL released an official statement addressing the rumors that the San Diego Chargers were leaving San Diego. “Despite what fans and spectators say,” Chargers head coach  Mike McCoyfish said in a recent interview, “The Chargers will be moving for the next season, but it will not be …

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Killing it, in Senior Assassins

Bichael Mailey: Whilst strolling through the Wendy’s parking lot,  Mailey tripped over a small shrub. Upon seeing his assassin,  he cried out for help, but no one could save him from his demise as Molivia Shooker dispensed a nerf dart into his chest. Pike Levine: Enjoying a plate of hot …

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